PARENTING : What do I really need for my new baby?
It doesn't take that much, to raise a happy and healthy new baby
Congratulations!
The birth of a new baby is exciting, as well as scary and amazing!
You are preparing for the biggest moment in your life, want to be the best parent who ever lived, and want to ensure you do it all correctly. You are also busy learning as much as you can, so you know as much as possible about what to expect, going in to this next step of your life.
Trust me, no matter how well you prepare, you are never really "ready". No one has ever raised your baby before, so no book can roadmap the journey for you. However, because of your dedication, you will do fine and will figure it all out as you go, based on the feedback baby gives you. These little bundles of joy have a way of letting us know when we are doing things wrong, and when we are doing them right. While their signals can be confusing at first, you will catch on and be a pro very soon.
You and only you, will know your baby and what he or she needs. While outside support and advice is good and helpful at times, go with your maternal instinct for the most part and only heed the advice you wish to and that makes sense to you. Just because your best friend or even your mom says it, does not make it the best method for you and your baby. Never be afraid to disregard what people say if you do not think it is best for your child.
If you are unsure on something you hear, call your pediatrician and ask them. I remember my first child's doctor telling me that new parents are the ones he sees the most through the first year of a baby's life. This is the year he enjoyed the most, as he got the most calls and the most visits from the new parents, and got to know them the best. Never think of your questions as silly, or a bother. Your baby is important and you feeling equipped with information and the tools to be a good parent is vital to your success as a parent. So… if you wonder - ASK!
The main purpose of this article is to set your mind at ease, when it comes to the things you will need for this new little one. There is so much hype, especially on the internet, stating you need everything under the sun that there is to offer, or you are just not doing your parenting job correctly. This is just not so. If this were the case, how on earth did babies do well prior to the days of the internet or prior to these highly promoted products being invented?
We review a lot of products in the review center www.familyreview.org/reviews.php While most of these products are simply terrific ideas and offer a great deal of value to parents when they are needed, many items are not always "needed", but items that add convenience. When the budget is tight, these conveniences are not always possible (or responsible when you have a baby to support). This article will hopefully help you make the most of your dollar, when things are tight, and still have a happy and healthy baby.
So … we will cover the things one cannot live without, first.
BEFORE YOU GO IN TO HAVE BABY YOU WILL NEED THE FOLLOWING:
>>> A car seat. When I had my baby they would not let me even leave the hospital until they had fit checked the baby's carseat. This is the rule for many hospitals now, as the law is firm on babies having a carseat for any travel within a car.
There are many brands and styles to choose from, and choosing the one that meets your needs and baby's is the important part. Make sure it is easy to get in and out of your car - make sure the style fits in your car and make sure it is one that is for newborns.
Should you choose to purchase one second hand (we do not advise this), you will want to inquire to ensure it has not been in an accident, as this can make them unsafe should you have an accident. (remember - the one selling it may not be the only owner or may not tell you everything either). You will want to check to ensure it is sturdy and safe, and check the recall lists for that make and brand. It is easy to check it for recalls by calling the Auto Safety Hotline at 888/DASH-2-DOT. You want to check the label to see what year it was made, and then check with the manufacturer to see if they recommend using one that age. I would also highly advise having it checked at your local fire station for both safety assurance and to have them show you how to hook it in your car correctly. A carseat that is not placed properly will not withstand in an accident as it was intended.
>>> A place for baby to sleep. Co-sleeping, while practiced by many, is not the safe way to go. This is based on research for SIDS. The majority of babies who die from SIDS are either asleep with a parent in bed when it happens, or have co-slept with them earlier in the day. While it can happen even when they are asleep in their own bed, co-sleeping does raise the risk - so I do not advise it.
Having said that, this does not mean you need to go instantly out shopping and buy a $200 crib. Babies are not picky. They can sleep nicely in a cradle or bassinet for the first 3-4 months of life. This buys you some time to save up for buying a crib.
Buying a second hand crib is also an option, though you want to be careful. Make sure the crib is newer, and not an older one that has rails too far apart like they used to have. You want to check the recall lists to be sure that crib in particular has not been recalled. You also want to ensure all parts fit and work correctly and that everything is solid. The mattress is also very important. Make sure it fits snuggly in the crib, so there are not large gaps between the mattress and sides of crib. Make sure the mattress is not too soft and that it is in excellent condition - no holes, freying, etc.
Now if your carseat works as an infant seat as well, then the two items above are really the only big items you need for the first few weeks at home. Baby will not be doing much more than sleeping and eating for this timeframe, and really has no need for things like a swing, etc yet.
As far as smaller items … this will vary depending on your choices and the health of the baby at birth. Preemie babies need more things than full term babies, if you breastfeed you will need different things than someone choosing to bottlefeed etc. However, we will cover the basics and you can play the rest by ear and speak to your hospital nurse or pediatrician about anything special you may need for your baby, based on his or her needs at the time.
>>> Head rest / positioner for the car seat. While you can use blankets for this in a pinch, it is safer and easier to purchase a head positioner. They are reasonable in price and a big help while baby is tiny and unable to hold his head up.
If Bottle Feeding -
>>> Bottles - 4 oz.
>>> newborn nipples (slow)
>>> Something to sterilize the bottles and nipples in. This can be the dishwasher, or a pot or pan that will hold them, if you do not wish to purchase a bottle sterilizer.
If Breastfeeding -
>>> Nursing pads
>>> Nipple Shield
*** A nursing bra, nursing nightgown and nursing tshirts, along with a nursing pillow are very, very helpful, but not absolutely necessary if you cannot afford the added expense at the moment. A breastpump can also be helpful, depending on your situation. These can be quite costly, however, so base it on your own needs. Remember you can rent these too! And sometimes your insurance will pick up the tab, if they are doctor recommended.
>>> I suggest using a soother (binki, pacifier) as there is some evidence that this reduces the risk of SIDS when baby sleeps with them, and they are also a Godsend for a fussy, tired baby. You will want one with a small nipple on it for a newborn.
>>> Diapers - Either cloth diapers and covers, all in one cloth, or disposables. I suggest having some disposables, even if you choose to use cloth, just for those emergencies and trips to town etc. The added convenience is a big help in the early days. Also, when you first bring baby home those diapers are not a pretty sight. It will remind you of multiple diapers filled with a tarry substance. This is normal, but very, very messy and stains cloth diapers easily, so for the first two weeks I highly suggest disposables even for at home, just to make things easier when you are tired, trying to get on track with a new baby and schedule, and you are recovering. This is just one step you can take to make things a bit easier on yourself for the first bit.
>>> Wet Wipes or washable cloths
>>> Onesies or t-shirts. The quantity needed should be based on your laundry situation. If you plan to do laundry daily or can, you will not need as many as someone who has to go to town to do laundry one time a week. Plan on them using one to three each day, based on how many times they get them wet or soiled from eating, wetting, etc.
>>> Sleepers. Again, base the quantity on how often you can do laundry. Another factor for these is your clothing preference for day to day. Will you be dressing baby in cute outfits even when at home, or will you allow him or her to lounge in pj's if you are not going out? If this will be his main attire throughout the week, then you will go through more of them than if he only wears them for bedtime. Remember - baby is not too concerned what he is wearing - you are. As long as he is comfortable and warm, he is happy.
>>> Socks / Booties. A package of 5 pairs of socks and 2-3 pairs of booties, if buying a neutral color that will go with multiple outfits.
>>> Outfits. Base the quantity on your lifestyle. How often will he be wearing them? Remembering there are so many cute outfits, you will want them all - but you do not need many. Go easy and remember they are only in newborn size a very short time, so save your pennies and don't over indulge in them just because they are adorable. I cannot remember how many outfits my children never even got a chance to wear or only wore once or twice because I had just too many. What a waste.
>>> Blankets. This will depend on the season, and where you live. However, the basic rule is 2 receiving blankets, 2 medium weight blankets and a swaddling blanket. A swaddling blanket is not a luxury, it is a necessity. On those nights when baby will not stop fussing and you have no clue what is wrong, a swaddling blanket is the key.
>>> Sleepsack - I suggest having two of these, so when one is in the laundry you have one to use. Use these in place of a blanket for sleeptime.
>>> Sweater or coat, depending on season and location.
>>> Thermometer - Baby Tylenol (because they will always need them at 2 am when no stores are open!) - Aspirator (usually the hospital will give you one of these when you go home, so you may not need to buy one).
>>> Humidifier - When they get a cold, this will be the first thing the doctor says to use. Be sure to get a cold mist humidifier, not a hot one.
>>> Towel and washcloth for bath time. You may wish to buy a baby towel / washcloth, as they are usually softer and work well, but using a normal one will work too.
>>> Baby Bathtub is handy, but bathing baby in the sink is doable as well. In the first few weeks a sponge bath, laying them on a towel or a change pad, with a bowl of water, dipping the rag into the water bowl and then washing them with the cloth to bathe them works well and is easier than trying to maneuver a wiggly baby in a tub or sink.
>>> Baby brush / comb set.
>>> Change pad is handy, especially if you have a portable one that you can fold up, place in the diaper bag and take with you. When in a pinch you can also use a towel. This helps protect baby from the surface they are laying on for changing and also protects cloth etc. under them when you change them.
>>> Diaper bag. Any bag you admire and choose, that will hold bottles, diapers, wipes and a change of clothes will work as a diaper bag, even if it does not bear the name "diaper bag". Let your style choice be the choosing factor and don't feel like you have to have the highest priced bag on the market.
A stroller comes in very handy, once you and baby have settled in and want to get out on the town a bit. Arms get very tired, even carrying a little 6 lb bundle of joy, if you are walking a great distance … so a stroller is very important. There is no need to purchase an expensive one, if money is tight … but remember that while baby is tiny they should not be at a full incline … a stroller that allows them to recline, even if only partially, will keep them at a comfortable position for the ride.
Once baby is a few weeks old, and awake longer periods of time, a swing is such a big help. Babies love the soothing effect of a swing and moms love the few minutes this gives them with a content baby, so that mom can use the phone or do her nails without baby in her arms.
A wrap, sling or carrier, of whatever style you choose is very handy as well. While this is not a total necessity, the freedom it brings you when baby needs / wants to be close but you have things to do with your hands is a big help.
A baby monitor is very helpful but not mandatory. This is great for those times when they are sleeping away from you, but you want to know when they are waking up or if there is a problem. With this item you will want to ensure you get one that works in your home. Not all monitors are created equal, so test it when you get home, before it is needed, so you know if it works in your home or if it picks up a lot of "noise / feedback" that makes it impossible to hear baby or causes a lot of irritating noise that is intolerable for long durations.
With the items listed above, you will be able to bring baby home and do life together. While this list may seem bear, that is the goal - to show you that you do not need to have every item under the sun to have a baby.
Buy the things you have to have, then take your time scouting out those items that can make life easier and plan your purchases wisely. If it costs a lot but will only be used for 2-3 months, is it worth the money in your financial situation right now? This is your call. Be sure to check reviews on products, ensuring they do what they claim, and shop around for the best deal you can find, to stretch the dollar. Remember, college will be here before you know it.
!!! >>>>>>>> TIPS <<<<<<<< !!!
Tips, be they from me, your mom, your best friend or your neighbor - they are just that - tips. It is up to you and your child's doctor to decide what is right for you and your baby. Speak with your child's pediatrician and see what is best… but the following tips will give you some guidelines on what you should be aware of and check on with the doctor.
!!! (Doctors are saying now that babies do not need for us to use powder, lotion, soap and shampoo on them. With the new reports on the potential hazards of Phthalates and them being an added ingredient many times in baby care products, simplifying bathtime may be a good thing. Simply washing baby well with water will clean them. If you choose to use soaps and shampoos etc., use ones that do not contain the Phthalates. You will have to research the product, as Phthalates are not listed in the ingredients but are often still there. If a product has a scent, it is probable that it contains Phthalates.)
!!! (Powder is not suggested. If baby breathes it in, it can cause from temporary breathing problems up to asthma and can also cause them to cough/choke terribly, and have a hard time getting their breath. If you must use it, place a small amount on your hands, and carefully place it on baby so it does not enter the air around them.)
!!! (Remember, after bathing baby, you want to ensure they are very dry, especially where the skin folds at all. Under the arms, behind the knees, behind the ears, etc. These are places where moisture likes to hide and it will lead to skin irritation and raw skin if you allow it to remain moist - so be sure these areas are dried very well.)
!!! (To reduce the risk of SIDS, it is best not to use blankets when baby is sleeping in bed. There are many sleepsack type alternatives on the market, and these are much safer.)
!!! ( Keep all toys, stuffed animals, extra blankets, etc. out of the bed at sleep time. These increase the risk of suffocation and / or SIDS.)
!!! (Remember: Baby should always sleep on his back, to reduce the risk of SIDS.)
!!! (Never put baby to bed with a bottle. This will rot their teeth and can lead to choking hazards as well.)
!!! (Baby should always ride in the back seat of a car, for his safety. Airbags can cause severe harm to an infant.)
!!! (Baby should be in a rear facing car seat until he is 25 lbs.)
!!! (Once baby is a year old, I suggest breaking them from using a pacifier, as they can be damaging to their teeth, causing them to be crooked or unevenly spaced.)
